Preservitis- A New Disorder Identified?

(Re-post from 2010 SciFiChick@baconandeggs)

There is a newly recognized disorder that has come to the attention of folks across the country.  Although this disorder has been around for many years, it now has an identifiable name. That name is Preservitis. Symptoms include, but are not limited to the uncontrollable urge to can, dehydrate, freeze or otherwise preserve every fruit and vegetable that come across the path of the affected individual.  This disorder may become more intense as the summer season winds to a close.  Person's with this affliction have also been known to try unconventional recipes so as to save every known part of said fruits and vegetables.

   There is no known cure for this disorder at this time.  The prescribed treatment is to let the symptoms run their course.  To alleviate symptoms, it is recommended to allow the affected individuals to pursue their urges to can, dehydrate freeze foods until the symptoms have dissipated.  It appears that once they have found that all fruits and vegetables have been attended to, the affected individuals return to a semi-normal state of mind. Studies have shown that symptoms will usually ease off as the summer winds to a close.  

WARNING-  In most patients these urges WILL return year after year. Researchers believe that Preservitis will become more prevalent as society begins to sense a growing need for self-sustained living.