I learned a long time ago, while working at a popular breakfast spot, Stop stressing... Its just Bacon and Eggs... How bad can you mess that up?
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Repeat Offender
I found myself in a interesting situation first thing this morning. And now I have a hard decision to make. You see, I think there may a criminal living out in the back yard. And that I may be harboring a fugitive.
I wonder if I might be an accomplice, after the fact, to a kidnapping although no ransom has been demanded. The suspect is pleading the fifth. When questioned she just wags her tail and refuses to answer my questions. Even though she was caught dead to rights with the evidence in her possession she is not being cooperative. If charged she will become a repeat offender.
Circumstantial evidence and the knowledge that she is still a suspect in a similar crime two weeks
ago leads me to believe that "said suspect" broke out again last night and went over the fence. From there she proceeded to enter into a residence toybox and take a hostage.
After her crime spree, the suspect jumped BACK over the fence and brought the apparent kidnap victim with her. She is claiming innocence but it's hard to be all that convincing with a Stuffed Santa hanging out of your mouth. Yeah, you read that right. A stuffed Santa all dressed in red. Who, by the way, can be seen all the way out to the street. At this time the victim appears to be in stable condition but a bit shook up.
And so now I have a choice to make. Do I turn a blind eye to the crime? Should I call the local law dawg? Or maybe the Dog Whisperer would be a better option?
I thought about confiscating the evidence and possibly trying to find the owner of one Stuffed Santa. The thing is...she looked so happy dragging it around all over the yard.
~~Hey...I'm Just Sayin...~~
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I think you do have a criminal in your mist. But like you, I just wouldn't know what to do about it. lol
ReplyDeleteLMAO!! Rottie!! We had 2 such pilfering pets.. both rotties with an obsessive need to care for stuffed animals. When caring for their limp synthetic children.. they would carefully nip off the odd plastic protrusions.. like the hard noses and eyes... then swallow it. It was very common to clean the yard.. and have a pile stare right back at ya. Imagine a Picasso model.. post digestion.
ReplyDeleteroflmao...call the Dog Whisperer! Maybe he'll do a show with you.
ReplyDeleteAt this point, if it were my child's stuffed toy that had been pilfered by said pooch, I probably wouldn't want it back. But I dunno, harboring a criminal (even an adorable one) might get ya in trouble sooner or later! lol
She needs a good lawyer....I would plea bargain for 2 Milkbones and a rawhide chew...
ReplyDeleteAiding and Abetting is a criminal offense. Be careful!!
ReplyDeleteROTFLH!!! Love your sense of humor lady!
ReplyDeleteWe don't have criminals in that sense but we do have deceiver. They go to the neighbors door, and give that "pitiful me look"( mind you they are well fed, thus the title "Deceivers") and wouldn't you know it they always manage to get some sort of treat. Our Deceivers know how to work it, this morning they got biscuits from my folks, bacon from another neigbor and I think they're holding off or planning a new scheme for the bachelor neighbor this afternoon*wink*
Thats to funny, I love it.
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